Things I Miss and Don’t Miss About Dieting

Although I no longer pursue weight loss in hopes of having a smaller body, there are a few things I miss about the institution of dieting.

Things I miss: Structure. Praise for “succeeding.” The excitement and desire that THIS diet will be the ONE! Feeling superior. Pride for working out harder than anyone I knew. Keeping a workout diary to record PR’s. Feeling like an inspiration to others.

Things I don’t miss: Ruining vacations with my husband because I had to workout or refused to eat somewhere I didn’t deem acceptable for my plan. Jealousy that others could have a “cheat meal” when that ONE meal would ruin weeks of work. Declining invitations with friends and loved ones because I’d rather workout or eat at home. Having a fitness-watch tan line. Obsessing about numbers. Crying all the time. Constant disappointment in myself. Not seeing the scale budge for 1,095 days in a row no matter how little I ate or how hard I worked out. Feeling like a disappointment to others when I couldn’t get smaller. Measuring body parts with a tape measure including my wrists & ankles. Extreme anxiety/downright anger when life happened and got in the way of my plans. Meal planning for 3-4 hours every Friday night. Inputting said meal plans in My Fitness Pal 7 days ahead of time, manipulating macros by tablespoons of food to get those percentages JUST RIGHT. Stressing about my MFP streak. Using social media for accountability. Eating things that I truly didn’t enjoy. Counting steps. Working out when I was exhausted or injured or both.

There are only a few things I truly miss about being on a diet. But honestly, the hardest part about not being on a diet is the loneliness. When practically everyone on the planet is on a diet, it’s difficult to turn your back on something so mainstream and bang your anti-diet drum loudly. So, I do it quietly and bravely, and hope that someday my tribe will grow. I’m okay with being a radical, because I know that being in a smaller body did not serve me. I refuse to grow old wishing I was smaller. Living my best life means enjoying it, and counting moments with loved ones, not workout hours, macros and carbs.